Why do we hurt the people closest to us and expect them to understand and forgive us.

There are very few people in my life that I would say I love endlessly.

But those people are the people I hurt frequently and feel I also let down a lot, I wish that they could be the people I always made feel proud of me.

The constant reminder that I will hurt them or make them ashamed consumes me and sometimes I wonder would it be better if I let them go and protected them in this way?