Depression Blog

We all need to worry less about other people and more about ourselves. If we can stop worrying about letting people down or making them feel bad through our own negativity, our lives would be easier.

It is hard to not think something is wrong or even expect the worse scenario. Just be kind to yourself and let it ride.

If you choose not to do this then it is inevitable that what you fear will happen. Sometimes the most destructive things to us are those we create.

There are some important steps I follow to help me fight my anxiety and panic attacks, with each day that goes by I feel that much more in control.

1. Stop expecting the worse – You are more than capable of not letting your negative thoughts rule your mind, be kind to yourself and stop willing the bad things to happen.

2. Don’t sweat the small stuff – When you find yourself worrying take a step back and ask yourself the question; Is this really so important or am I just blowing out of all proportion?

3. Exercise breathing techniques – Take the time to listen to your own breathing and focus on the calming this brings.

4. When you feel anxious remove yourself from the situation – Don’t avoid contact with people. Be safe in the knowledge if you need to remove yourself from the situation you can do this.

Here are 10 steps I follow on a daily basis to help control my depression and negativity.

1. Make time for you

2. Be Selfish

3. Don’t feel guilty

4. Stop fearing what may happen

5. Get out and be more active

6. Know your own mind

7. Stop feeling sorry for yourself

8. Give yourself routine

9. Don’t feed your negative thoughts

10. Believe in yourself and what you can achieve

I have been following these steps now for nearly 2 months and I can already feel the difference, you do have to motivate yourself daily but perseverance is the key to success.

When I am having what I would call a good day I still find it hard to focus.

Depression is the one thing I find it hard to take my mind off, Its a constant struggle for anyone to hold my concentration for any period of time.

Although keeping busy is a good way of fighting these thoughts it isnt the best way for me to switch off.

For years I have wanted to be able to have a proper conversation with people around me without loosing all interest and my mind wandering.

I used to get to the point where I would just look around the room or at anything but the person who was talking to me and occasionally I would find an excuse to walk away.

This is quite self destructive and I often found myself being referred to as rude which in turn made me isolate myself from the world.

Now I make that extra effort to hold conversations and not find I want or need a way out.

You see, it was all about my personal space; Id get to a point where I would feel invaded and need to get some space and room to breath.

When I know I am going into a situation where I will maybe have a conversation with someone I always without fail take a couple of big breaths before entering the environment.

Not only does this give me time to slow the sheer panic that takes over my body but it gives me time to adjust.

Depression often causes people to stand alone in one way or another and shelter themselves from those around them.

This is what I call the period of isolation and most sufferers have been through this at one point or another.

It is hard when you feel you want to hide from the world especially when you are mainly hiding from those you care about most.

I have spent days under my duvet just wishing the hours away, hoping this feeling would pass or that the struggle would end.

Whilst in this terrible place the only things I had any time for were my cat and dog, they used to come and see me and snuggle with me in bed.

This was the only love I ever felt in my darkness and the only thing that helped me step back out into the light.

These feelings can pass though, with a little determination and a lot of patience we can all get through this.

My saviours were my animals because we all need someone to live on for, who do you live for?

We can all find it hard to do those things we want to but finding the fear and challenging it could be the first step.

I choose not to do certain things because I am scared of either failing or beating my fear.

Panic attacks are a big thing for me and I know I have power over them to an extent however if I put myself in to a situation where I feel less then comfortable, then I am quite aware I may trigger the over whelming panic.

Fear is what drives me a lot of the time and I can’t help but feel like I’m trapped by it.

When I feel at my worse but I know I am going to push myself I take myself to somewhere I feel safe in my mind and I project all the negative thoughts into pictures.

Once enabling myself to do this I then picture them in frames and focus on them in black and white.

You can then reduce the size of the image in your mind and remove it slowly out of focus and eventually out of sight.

This is a very good way of minimising your stress levels and removing the thought from your mind.

I practise this on a daily basis to get the best results and within time you will feel the difference it makes too.

Recently there has been a significant rise in young women who have been misdiagnosed with clinical depression due to their premenstrual syndrome.

It is said that the psychological symptoms are very similar in both mental and hormonal patients, and unfortunately this makes the condition harder to diagnose.

The National Association for Premenstrual Syndrome have advised that women suffering from hormonal problems will usually start to be affected by these symptoms around a week before their period starts. The effects can then go on to last around 2-3 weeks, leaving approximately 2 weeks each month symptom free.

If you are unsure if you have been misdiagnosed then we recommend keeping a daily diary for a period of 3 weeks documenting your mood swings and emotions. You can then approach your GP with your findings.

I have found that from my personal experience that it can be difficult keeping a diary expressing your emotions. From experience, I would suggest that you mark your daily moods out of 10 and briefly detail your feelings such as how vulnerable you are feeling. If your finding that your forgetting to fill in your diary then it may help you to keep it next to your bed or by your make-up mirror.

Although anti-depressants can work for both conditions it is thought that they should be considered as a last resort for PMT as there are less drastic treatments that would offer similar benefits.

Sarah Jarvis from The Royal College of General Practitioners has indicated that a lot of women want a ‘quick fix’ and solutions straight away; due to this doctors often reach for the prescription pad.

If you are being treated for depression and have any doubts about your diagnosis then I would strongly recommend you take a daily diary as detailed above and then consult your GP with your findings.

When focusing on your fears you become more aware of them, once you are fully aware of your fears you can deal with them.

Don’t let fear hold you back, take control and pave your own destiny.

When I’m feeling particularly anxious and depressed I seem to choose this time to analyze my relationship with my partner.

Not only is this self destructive on my part but it causes a knock on effect and then eats away at the foundations of our relationship.

I talk about this now because I am going through it at this very moment, this is not just a reflection of the past.

Maybe this is the wake up call we all need at some point?

Every once in a while I hit the self destructive button and I change, not always towards my relationship sometimes towards my friends and my life style.

Recently I have come to realize my true friends aren’t around me anymore, they have moved on with their lives and I’m left with those who don’t really care about me.

The type of people you would get blind drunk with and not much else.

I have removed myself from that social circle now and all I am left with is myself and my partner, therefore I’m a little lonely and very needy.

Yes I can stop this behaviour, I know it will take time but I will learn to love myself again and find that confident form of grace I had about me.

At this very moment I have decided to make the change and I am doing what preparation is needed to find myself again.

I refuse to loose this fight and I won’t keep pushing him away, I am so much stronger than I give myself credit for.

We could all very easily dwell on the past and all our misfortunes.

But if we try to take a step back and appreciate that trying times affects every one and not just you alone.

I really do believe that every eventuality can be dealt with, why should your bad times rule you and become your life?

Sometimes life is hard and situations are out of your control, we all need to remember this is life and we can muster the strength to beat the sadness and anguish.

Look deep in to yourself and find the courage to overcome all obstacles in your path and then you will truly be in charge of your own destiny.